Author Archives: drstephen

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Happy is the New Sexy

by drstephen

Happy

Want to be more attractive? Smile.

As it turns out, happy people are more attractive than sad, angry, stoic or confused looking people.

I don’t want to tell you how much money (and other resources) were invested to discover / prove this, but as it turns out, we are attracted to people who appear to be happy.

The scientist in me is compelled to double-click on the work attraction and unpack for you the logical explanation of this primal law.  I could write pages defending the notion that “happiness” conferred a reproductive or survival advantage to our ancestors…but need I?

(If you must…read here…and here)

Happiness wears many faces, but all of these faces are easy to read.

We know Joy when we see it.  We are wired to want more of it.  And we are driven to seek it’s source.

You can be its source. 

No perfume, sporty car or prestigious position can compete.

A smile is the magnet that pulls the strongest on the metal that we’re made of; but even more encouraging is the truth that smiles are always available and infinitely divisible. Give them away freely, you can always make more.

Happily (I am smiling.  I wish that I used emoticons, one would be useful here.),

SF

Dr. Stephen Franson

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Immersion and Eating Elephants

by drstephen

eating

Show me what you’re “studying” and I’ll show you who you are becoming.

We are all studying something. Something has your attention. There is that something that is consuming you…your time, your focus, your energy. What is it?

Dr. John Demartini taught me “Your inner-most dominant thoughts become your outermost tangible reality.”

I am one to be suspicious of any “secret” to instant success, health, fortune, or happiness – so please, don’t misread this message. I believe that all of these are achievable, with varying degrees of effort, challenge, and support at any given time. I also believe that none of them should be left to chance.

The New Year is the perfect time to point your life. Start with your focus. What do you wish to become this year?

Each year my wife and I select our Immersion Subject – our Elephant. As the adage goes: How do you eat an elephant?  One bite at a time. Our elephant is the subject of the year’s study and focus.

We select a subject of significance, something relevant to our lives – an element of mutual interest. Of course, this can be done as an individual, but sharing this process with another only enriches the experience.

Pick a topic that you want to learn more about. You will read, listen to CDs and Podcasts, and attend seminars and workshops on this subject. You will converse, journal, and write blog posts. You will go deeper – you will immerse yourself in your elephant.

Past elephants for us include pregnancy and childbirth, spirituality, financial management, politics, and fitness.  Approach the year like an MBA; define the objective (what are you trying to accomplish?), a strategy (how do you plan to accomplish it?) and tactics (what steps will you take to get there?).   Establish a Virtual Board of Trustees.  Create benchmarks and milestones.  Set goals, rewards and penalties.  Create the guardrails that you’ll need to stay on track and keep the world from pulling you off course.

Demartini created a tool to make Elephant Eating easier – the Manifestation Formula.

The real secret to growth is to make up your mind to grow. The rest is simply having the tools and the chops to see it through.

It’s going to be a fantastic year.

Dr. Stephen Franson

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Book of the Month: The Happiness Advantage

by drstephen

I am very “happy” to announce the launch of our long-awaited Bonfire Health Book of the Month Club!

The first book that we will feature is Shawn Achor’s The Happiness Advantage.

In his Harvard University class by the same name; Shawn advanced the discussion around happiness and how it influences experiences and outcomes – and even predicts success.

What makes Shawn’s work unique is the over-riding narrative regarding the order of the happiness formula: Happiness first, and then success.

This flies in the face of traditional thought and intuition.  Most think that people are happy because they are successful in love, in school, at work, etc…as it turns-out; the experts had it backwards all along.

Achor takes the Wellness Paradigm to the field of psychology and turns it on its head.

He insists that better outcomes can be achieved for everyone if we expand our scope in healthcare beyond a limited focus on crisis care.  He suggests that when we study those “outliers” that are truly happy we can identify common behaviors that prime and promote the happiness that is clearly predictive of success.

And we agree with him.

Stay tuned for more this month on the Happiness Advantage.

Smile,

Doc

Dr. Stephen Franson